March 23rd, 2004


Akitsugu II

Akitsugu sat up with a start.
He realized how much his head ached.
How much his whole body ached.

He laid back down on the wrinkled blankets and sighed. He could hear birds chirping outside and filtered sunlight warmed his face but burned his tired eyes. Ima wa..nanji? [What time is it..?]

He could not remember the last time he'd been awake. It seemed like he had been lost in shadowy dreams for ages. He knew what had happened but he could not quite remember anything clearly. Someone had bound up his hand in a bandage, though. Who was that? And his cousin - had his cousin been here?

Though a chill crept over the room, his grey yukata was warm against his skin. Chill? Was it cold outside today? Why, he had felt so fevered before...

Though the pain hadn't subsided, Akitsugu knew he must get up. He sat up in his sheets and slowly rose to a stand - even so, his head felt dizzy and light. And he cursed the people who had done this.

It was midday and the draft was coming from the partially open shoji. Akitsugu limped stifly over to the screens, but the light was still to harsh for his weary eyes to suffer, so he closed them and sank to his knees with a groan. How miserable this feeling was. Not only did the pain blur his eyes, but he was missing his glasses.

Where were those glasses...

He ran a hand through his downy light hair, rubbed his golden eyes, and caught his breath. At least I am alive. In pain, but alive. Alone, but with myself. They left me that much.

And they will not live long enough to regret that.

Teehee dont worry Akitsugu is not as mean as he sounds - he is just ready to encounter the people who have been threatening his family for over 20 years...he's not too happy with them. Ah well, Akitsugu is ok^^ He'll recover and help protect his cousin and siblings as well from the people who have been threatening them all this time. It all works out in the end somehow O.o I think - lol ^_^
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Iyaa! Daigaku wa "gaku" dakara!

Today, March 23d, 2004 at about 3:15 in the afternoon in Breidenbaugh Hall, Gettysburg College, Japanese Education & Modernization class:

We were discussing the Japanese college system and how they are so apathetic during those years, as they focus more on socializaion than the academic tests..

Then talked about the goal of US college...

One kid piped up and said:
The reason I am attending a reputable college like this and paying good money for it is to get a well paid job so I can buy whatever I want! That's the prupose of college, I think.

And I wanted to either cry or leap on a desk and point at him and say: Sonna koto jya nai - watashi ni!!!

And that is probably the most naive thing I could actually believe but that is how I feel!! I am paying money to have people guide me to find wisdom and enrich my spirit! Materialism be damned! (Ok, well I like consumption in the form of occassional manga or a tolerable computer but if that is all can find happiness and fullfillment in...then they must be very sad...because consumerism is just an addiction like alcohol - you are happy while you are high on it but when you don't have it you are miserable!!

And that is NOT the kind of happiness I want!!!!
I want a happiness that comes from having sincere joy in living and learning and growing mentally and spiritually!! >.< THAT IS WHY I GO TO COLLEGE AND THAT IS WHY I LIVE!

*Megan gasps for breath after her long rant*
Sorries if I was a bit much but that is a very deep and grating thing for me and I HAD to rant about it!

I love learning and learning to love life for the things which can't be bought^^ It makes me so sad that others do not have that ;_;

On the flip side....
Since I am just lookign for wisdom and education, I am not really focusing on what career I will pursue...that is rather bad. But I wanna learn a little about everything!! Besides, even though a job is important, it is the person behind the job that makes the difference, ne? ...hmm I dunno.

Maybe I am wrong after all

Since this culture doesn't seem to value such things as I do, maybe I will fail in this world. That's the ongoing struggle I face...

In the past few years there has been little to stir up this deeply felt kind of response (mainly it was just the whole issue at high school with my Titanic project and my fight for respect for others - even if they were dead I didn't feel they should be treated like story book characters and I desperately wanted to make an account of the actual people in their honor out of the purest sincerity. My teacher didn't seem to get that. And I hurt her feelings and also "made her worry about me" cause she thought my seriousness was unhealthy. But with some things I refuse to compromise. And my desire to prove my respect as well as my ongoing search for truth and wisdom are just that!)

PS - Added comment: I may be relatively passive most of the time but if the wrong chord is hit my insides resonate! I guess that's why I like Setsuka - she's pretty and calm on the outside but she's got some kinda hidden inner sharpness (thus why she's the female Sakurazukamori^^)

Akitsugu III

Akitsugu stepped into the chamber, single-toothed geta clogs clicking on the floor.
And everyone hushed.
"Hisashiburiyone!" [It's been a while!] Akitsugu said with a slight grin.
Everyone was in shock. He had returned after all! He should not have come back here...for his sake as well as our own! And they looked at him with awe, fear, and pity.
He was dressed in a white kimono with a grey and white shibori haori jacket. It depicted a snowy swirled imagery and the Takeshi faminy crests were embriodered in gold. His left wrist was still bound in a bandage, not yet healed. And a firey determination glowed in his eyes behind the glasses. A perfect balance seemed to be held and he knew it. He was going to play this to the end.

"I come with the newfound blessings of Amaterasu and her kin as I stand before the holies of the court now," he said bowing.
And such balance he had even on such geta sandles as his!

The young head of the court acknowledged his introduction, but was rather sad to see him here...such games we all must play...

Akitsugu met his eyes and nodded with understanding. But nothing could hold him back.

He drew his katana and the onlookers gasped as one.

"I come to make a challenge to those who threaten the court and their families. I come to find their answer to my plea of 'why'? The murder of my parents and the manipulation of my friends - why?"

"You really think we would be lured out by this showing of ignorance?"

Akitsugu waited.

And soon would follow the end of that fall day. it would end in cloudy skys the rain would fall to purify to the fallen.
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