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June 27th, 2006

Awaken - convince me to wake up!

Getting over that groggy feeling in the morning to wake up is really hard for me. It took me all night to get comfortable and rested, and now when the alarm goes off, it ruins all I worked so hard to do. So, what do I do? I desperately cling to sleep even though I know I can't go back. Of course, I feel awful trying to drag it out, but the point is that I was comfortable and I don't want to surrender.
I found this to be much like faith. The shedding of the old flesh.

I have gotten comfortable in my skin, making a life for myself and finding it comfortable. Then, when I try to wake up to the spirit, to real life, I find it uncomfortable. Even though I feel better when I am awake, I struggle against myself, against waking up. I wondered why? Why isn't it easier to wake up, when it is good? I am miserable in the transition state!

If only I could wake up and feel alive!
If only I could convince myself to wake up!

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