February 14th, 2007

A Balance

Love and the Art of Life

God wants us to remember Him - the giver of blessings, the author of life.

It's very easy by forget. And by forget I mean ignore. Going through a day without reflecting on God's word or looking to Him for guidance and help. That's what I did for so many years. Even with Judges to remind me, I wouldn't turn back on my own. In fact, they made me more defensive than anything.

Yet on my own, I am nothing. What meaning does art have outside of its maker? For the artist designs and creates for a reason, instilling in a piece all kinds of aspirations, nostalgia, and devotion. So each person - all of my dear friends and strangers and people I fear - all have been shaped and gifted to do much good and fulfill meaning if they would recognize this. Everyone has a story.

Maria asked: How can believing in Jesus be the solution to one's life problem?

I babbled a little, unsure.
Then she told me: We all have a lot of problems - emotional, physical, a variety of problems. And the cause, the root, of all of these is sin.

Why do I complain? Because pride tells me that I deserve better than this.
Why am I depressed and anxious? Because I cannot look beyond the moment.
Why do I yell at people? Because I don't care how they feel when I am in a cranky mood.

I am proud, selfish, and unloving, to name a few. Maybe these aren't all that serious to most, but if I cannot conquer even these little issues, how will I cope when my life becomes very challenging? How can knowing Jesus help?
Jesus solved the sin problem, killing evil at it's very roots. What problem is not within his power, then? "But now he has appeared once for all at the end of the ages to do away with sin by the sacrifice of himself." Hebrews 9:26 Not only did Jesus pay the price, he helps us along the way. "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are — yet was without sin." Hebrews 4:15

She went on to explain how our very bodies are a battlefield. There is a spiritual war. Spirits of evil and the Holy Spirit of God battle for us. If we would seek the forgiveness of God, we will be cleansed, a pleasant sight. Just as a flower draws butterflies, so a humble and faithful heart will be a home for beauty. If one clings to the darkness to hide, however, their heart will draw in unclean attitudes that are not freeing, but indeed, imprisoning. Evil seeks out those it can claim, but we know that the will of God is good. God gives life and has gone to the limits to ensure that we might once again lay claim to that pure and eternal life He has in mind for us.

"For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day." -John 6:40
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still shot, Maria

Nostalgic journal reading

I was wandering through old posts and found some interesting little bits and pieces...

How fickle is the mind. I am a human date-book doing nothing but keeping track of dates and keeping harmony between myself and factors such as weather, people, and work. That's just...off...Hmmm.

It is frustrating being a student who goes from term to term, year to year doing nothing but learning and forgetting. No wonder it can be so tiring.

joy: as if everyday were the first - thankfulness: as if everyday were the last

A simple but curious line from a private post a year or two ago.

Pooled dripping of light
Upon this reflective floor
Tabi and haori

From my Noh class. Do my fellow classmates remember those days? How I miss the tap of the professor's fan on my shoulder when I was mistaken in my steps and the cheer from the chorus when a dancing team completed a step correctly before class even began!

At work I got a present! ^^ And I spent 3 hours "in the bowels" of the library attaching label holders to bins for old journals. It was fun, though I got tired of listening to myself hum for 3 hrs...and whenever I am down there I get really sleepy and lightheaded.

I miss being a student worker. Professionalism is not my cup of kocha. I wonder how my old bosses at Gettysburg are doing. What I wouldn't give to work there for them again. They are like family to me.

I walked into the Asian Studies office and a few mins later, Shen Laoshi and Li Laoshi came as well. I looked over, not wanting to interrupt them, but glad that I wasn't all alone anymore; and Li Laoshi exclaims: Mai Mi Lin! (I really love my Chinese name XD teehee)
Anyway, Li Laoshi has gotten over his illness and seems genki again - he chatted with me a while whiling eating a donut. For some reason, there were 3 boxes of donuts in the Asian Studies Suite...I was offered one but I'd just eaten lunch... Anyway, guess where Li laoshi is from? 20 mins outside the University of Maryland!! wai! He told me some about it before he went to find lunch and I am again excited about it. Maybe it won't be so bad afterall. I hope Li Laoshi can give me hints on getting around the area - since it is a big city O_o;;

I had no idea what it would be like here. Ironically, I haven't once got in touch with Li laoshi about traveling around the area. I wonder how he and the rest of the gang are doing back at Breidenbaugh Hall? I wonder what they would all say if they spent a day with me and saw how I run my schedule! I have changed a lot in just a few months.

Someone said once: "Making things is fraught with terror..."

Was this a Dune quote? I think it must be.
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